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Five years of brainwashing down the drain - Spin the Moon [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
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Five years of brainwashing down the drain [Jun. 2nd, 2007|11:36 am]
spinthemoon
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I have a thing about McDonald's. Big surprise, you're thinking. Is there anything you don't have a thing about?

Don't be mean. Since one of my things is makings lists, I can list lots of things about which I don't have a thing. 

One thing which would not make the list of things about which I don't have a thing is McDonald's, because as I mentioned just  right up there ^^^^ at the beginning of this post, I have a thing about McDonald's. 

I can't say exactly when this thing began, because I don't think it did. I think it just sprang, full-blown, the day the first franchise opened in my town. I hated everything about it. The golden arches, the stupid clown, the hyper-active color-saturated commercials with sentient food...I think, even as a child, I was somewhat alarmed by a fast food place so obviously targeting children in their advertising and merchandising.

My first love, Burger King, was much more sensible. Their commercials emphasized the fact that you could order a burger, fries, and a drink, and still get change back from your dollar. Yes, I am that old. Their food was what it was - with the exception of the Whopper, nothing had stupid names. Unlike McDonald's, which insisted on prefixing everything with "Mc", like "McBurger" or "McDrink". It was like being spoken to in baby talk. "Would McPoopsy like some McKetchup on her widdle McBun?" One of the first times I remember laughing until I cried was when Johnny Carson commented in his monologue how someone associated with the McDonald's corporation died when he "McChoked to McDeath on a bag of McFries."

McDonald's hasn't done much over the years to win me over. They were among the first to try becoming  hip by nicknaming themselves, calling themselves "Micky D's". It was sad, like the nerdy kid who desperately wants to be cool and starts trying to get everyone to call him "Razor" or "Flash" in the hopes that he will seem far more interesting than he really is.

The one saving grace of McDonald's is the Ronald McDonald house, which is awesome beyond compare and buys them a lot of points in my book, but not enough that I will actually eat there.

Or take my children to eat there. Not only do I not take my children to eat there, I spend a lot of time and effort actively brainwashing my children into thinking that eating at McDonald's is only a half-step above digging someone else's leftover broccoli out of a dumpster. It was heartwarming, really, to hear The Boy pipe up from the back seat, every time we drove past a set of golden arches, McDonald's is icky!

He would occasionally confide to me, wide-eyed, that one of his playmates had eaten at McDonald's and lived to tell the tale. We would wrinkle our noses together and say Ewwwww and stick out our tongues and laugh.

Then yesterday, he went swimming with his cousins, and afterwards, they went to McDonald's. He came home, bursting with the news that McDonald's french fries were really good.

McShoot me McNow. Where is that memory-erasing gizmo when you really need it?
 

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Comments:
[User Picture]From: jchammonds
2007-06-03 08:48 pm (UTC)
Ahahahaha! McShoot you Mcnow! Haha, again! I really like McD's, but the fries are so, so bad (for me, they taste wonderful!) that I've only eaten bites of other people's for about two years.
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[User Picture]From: spinthemoon
2007-06-05 05:37 am (UTC)
Shhhh...don't tell, but I do think they have good fries.
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[User Picture]From: julzlady
2007-06-04 03:15 pm (UTC)

Ah, good ole McDonalds'!

Devin and I decided to ban McDonald's years ago, mainly for political reasons (labor and environmental practices). Really, Devin decided, and I went along with it, since I agree with his reasons (I just don't necessarily think choosing just *one* such company makes sense)...

Politics aside, when it came to explaining our decision to the boys, Devin said, "McDonald's cuts down lots of trees, and trees are important, so we don't want to give our money to McDonald's anymore." Simple and to-the-point. The boys embraced it. They refused to let family members take them to McDonald's. They informed our friends, their friends, everyone they encountered that "McDonald's cuts down trees!" Devin was forced to get into a lengthy political discussion with his very conservative family over business practices and boycotting.

Every once in a long, long while, we still go to McDonald's. Usually when we're travelling and it's the only fast food place around and we're all starving. In the past...5 years, we've been to McDonald's twice.

The first time was when we lived in the house with the sewage problem. The one with the big evergreen trees in the front yard that blocked the sewer line, causing sewage to back up into our basement every time it rained</>. Coincidence being what it is, the tree removal crew came to take down the trees about a week after our trip.

A few months ago, we were on the turnpike and Devin was ravenous, so decided to stop at a rest area. For whatever reason, the only thing open at the rest area was the McDonald's. As we pulled up to the drive-through, Liam started crying. He was convinced that McDonald's was going to come and cut down the big climbing trees in our backyard if we bought food there.
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[User Picture]From: julzlady
2007-06-04 03:17 pm (UTC)

Re: Ah, good ole McDonalds'!

Apparently I forgot an i in my html tags.

D'oh!
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[User Picture]From: spinthemoon
2007-06-05 05:37 am (UTC)

Re: Ah, good ole McDonalds'!

Isn't scary just how much influence we have sometimes?
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[User Picture]From: julzlady
2007-06-05 01:53 pm (UTC)

Re: Ah, good ole McDonalds'!

I almost forgot.

Last summer (?) when the commercials for McDonald's started singing "I'm lovin' it," Liam started mocking them. Every time we drove past a McDonald's (which is actually rarer around here than elsewhere, it seems), he'd sing, "Doo doo doo doo, I'm hatin' it!"
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From: blissonbliss
2007-06-04 04:21 pm (UTC)
McKudos for trying though. You managed to get this far before someone ruined it all. I am weak in the face of the marketers. This week we went there because they were giving away Shrek drinking glasses. They were pretty nice, sturdy glasses too. Now we'll have to collect all four. Sigh.
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[User Picture]From: spinthemoon
2007-06-05 05:38 am (UTC)
And years from now, you can sell them on Ebay!
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From: misty_bay
2007-06-04 10:58 pm (UTC)

The Boy is a mctraitor.

Even as a child, I found the 'mc' in front of everything a tad bit ridiculous. Still do. But it is kind of fun watching them backpedal over the fact that the whole world has gone low fat/carb/calorie/taste.

Who goes to McDonalds for apple slices? And who goes to a farmers market for a Bic Mac?

We used to go, but now it just upsets my stomach. Like Bliss, we do like the toys. Oh, and the Newf loved double cheeseburgers. :O)
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[User Picture]From: spinthemoon
2007-06-05 05:38 am (UTC)

Re: The Boy is a mctraitor.

I know. If I want a salad, I go to my fridge.
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From: (Anonymous)
2007-06-05 08:54 am (UTC)
If there were no McDonalds, my kids would never get to eat when we go traisping. They are in every airport. They line the 95 from MA to New York. Seriously. You can't find a rest stop without one in the entire state of Conneticut.

Burger King makes me use the toilet. (I know, TMI.)

While I'm not a huge fan, the prices are reasonable and (I gotta side with the boy) the fries are delish!

But what the world really needs is more Del Taco!!

Milli



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[User Picture]From: spinthemoon
2007-06-05 12:25 pm (UTC)
Whew! I was about to say we can't be friends any more, but you won me back with Del Taco!!
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[User Picture]From: julzlady
2007-06-05 01:49 pm (UTC)
What is Del Taco?
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From: (Anonymous)
2007-06-06 09:06 am (UTC)
Just the greatest Mexican fast food franchise on the planet!

(Hi Julz btw!!!)
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